Friday Funny—Extreme Rednecks

You’re An EXTREME Redneck When  . . . . . 
You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids. 
The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it. 
You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws. 
You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night. 
You wonder how service stations keep their rest rooms so clean.
Someone in your family died right after saying ‘Hey, guys, watch this’.
You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader. 
A ceiling fan once ruined your wife’s  hairdo. 
Your junior prom offered day care. 
You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are ‘Gentlemen, start your engines’. 
You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels. 
The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.
You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
One of your kids was born on a pool table. 
You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. 
You can’t get married to your sweetheart because there’s a law against it. 
You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

About Linda Andrews

Linda Andrews lives with her husband and three children in Phoenix, Arizona. When she announced to her family that her paranormal romance was to be published, her sister pronounce: "What else would she write? She’s never been normal." All kidding aside, writing has become a surprising passion. So just how did a scientist start to write paranormal romances? What other option is there when you’re married to romantic man and live in a haunted house? If you’ve enjoyed her stories or want to share your own paranormal experience feel free to email the author at She’d love to hear from you.
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