Eating the Elephant

If you’re older than 5, you’ve probably heard that joke: How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. It seems I have a few elephants in my house. And as you know elephants take up lots of space. One would think I would have noticed a pack of pachyderms earlier but apparently they start off small then grow to humongous proportions.

Kinda like that baby alligator in the sewer that goes on to star in his own horror movie.

The rather hefty size of the elephants came to my attention when I tried to put away my Christmas presents. I should mention I received 2 Blu-Ray movies, 5 CDs, a teapot and teas, Plus one book. So you’re not looking at more than a cubic foot of Christmas booty.

And yet this seems to  be too much for my cabinets.

So something has to give. It won’t be my animated Disney movie collection (even if I have most of them memorized) or my music. Or my books. or…

Well, I think we’re all beginning to see how the elephants got so large.

Still, I think it is safe to say I should be able to part with some things (or perhaps get rid of some of my husband’s when he isn’t looking). But I need to start small so I don’t go through withdrawals. And like eating an elephant I’ll do it bit by bit.

I started last week and cleaned out the coffee table. My friend’s granddaughter is now the proud owner of one clump of purple play-doh, a jump rope, a Halloween puzzle and four sets of flash cards-addition, subtraction, multiplication and division. She’s 3 but I know she’ll use them eventually.

Next weekend, I’ll tackle the desk in my bedroom. Tax season is almost here and I know there’s some receipts I’ll need.

By starting small, I hope to have my house cleaned out before I retire:D

About Linda Andrews

Linda Andrews lives with her husband and three children in Phoenix, Arizona. When she announced to her family that her paranormal romance was to be published, her sister pronounce: "What else would she write? She’s never been normal." All kidding aside, writing has become a surprising passion. So just how did a scientist start to write paranormal romances? What other option is there when you’re married to romantic man and live in a haunted house? If you’ve enjoyed her stories or want to share your own paranormal experience feel free to email the author at She’d love to hear from you.
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3 Responses to Eating the Elephant

  1. danrshaw says:

    If you would simply dump the husband and the kids you would have plenty of room. The other plus side is you would have lots more time on your hands.
    If that isn’t an option you could hire one of those organizers who come into your home and help organize it.
    If that isn’t an option rent a warehouse to store what isn’t being used.
    Yard sale time?
    Trip(s) to Goodwill or Salvation Army?
    Bonfire in the backyard?
    Storage shed in the backyard?

    I’ll always find the more room I make around my own home the more stuff that seems to accumilate. I swear the clothes in my wifes closet seem to reproduce on their own accord. Maybe it’s all that time in the dark. We cleaned her closet out six months ago and had 40 hangers that had no use. Since then I’ve used every single one of them and need more. When we run out of hangers it seems everything I have hanging up gets folded and placed in a box in the closet.
    It’s not fair…

    • Hubby keeps me warm, so he’s staying thanks to that shock collar. I’m afraid when the kiddies move out I’ll expand and fill their space. I have a 2 car garage, a shed and a pool house and have already made a trip to Goodwill once this year. How many boxes can you fit in the closet?

      • danrshaw says:

        You can fit a lot of boxes in a closet if you reduce them to ashes.

        Maybe some of those space savor bags that suck the oxygen out would help?

        What’s better than that is mylar bags. Seal up on side till there is just enough room for the vac hose to fit and then suck out the air and quickly seal the opening. They last much longer and unlike the space savor bags they don’t leak air back into them over time.

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